Having somebody spend the time to be your mentor is a privilege, so it’s regular to surprise how you can be a superb mentee. A nice mentor shall be somebody you possibly can open up to and study from, to assist information you in your life, your profession and all the pieces that falls in between. Though that relationship could be important to your development and success, you additionally must respect its boundaries to make it work.

Due to this fact, there are particular issues you are able to do, as a mentee, to verify your relationship together with your mentor stays sturdy and helpful, even throughout the busiest quarters.

So whether or not you’re in search of a mentor or have already got one, right here are some things to recollect to be a superb mentee.

1. Clearly talk that you just’re in search of a mentor

Typically individuals take into account asking to get espresso or for quarter-hour of time as the beginning of a mentorship, however it helps in case you’re clear and so they know that you just’re truly asking for a mentor. (You is perhaps shocked—they could make investments extra within the dialog.)

So attain out with an specific function. If an e mail solely mentions grabbing espresso, it might appear much less urgent. And in case you do get on their calendar, don’t count on them to decide to future conferences the place you’re seeking to “decide their mind.” Current expectations as to what you might be in search of. Perhaps it’s a month-to-month assembly over espresso or 20-minute cellphone calls each different week. It will permit them to both commit or decline your provide and even open the dialog as much as a 3rd response—they could be inclined to introduce you to somebody on their crew or of their community who they really feel is a greater match.

2. Know what you need

Earlier than you method a possible mentor, ask your self:

• What am I making an attempt to study? What are my short- and long-term objectives?
• Why am I courting this specific chief? (Observe: As a result of she or he is wealthy and/or well-known shouldn’t be a legitimate purpose.) How can she or he assist me obtain these objectives?
• On the finish of the 12 months, what’s going to I take into account a win or a acquire from this relationship?

3. Perceive the mentor-mentee relationship

Mentoring must be pleasant, however it’s not a friendship. The time is used deliberately, with well-defined aims for every session that assist a long-term, overarching aim.

But, you also needs to deal with a mentorship like every other relationship in your life. It’s vital to acknowledge when particular recommendation or suggestions is especially useful. Share your success tales from the suggestions they gave you. Chances are high, your mentor will actually recognize it and should go on to share that very same recommendation with others.

Consider it like working with a private coach: If a sure exercise is making an impression, telling your coach will solely profit you each. Don’t be too shy to brag slightly! In spite of everything, you couldn’t have carried out it with out their assist.

4. Respect your mentor’s time

When considered one of my heroes, the legendary basketball coach John Wood, agreed to satisfy with me, I handled the chance as a one-shot deal. I arrived at his Los Angeles condominium armed with 5 pages of questions, single-spaced, on a authorized pad. He checked out me slightly surprised, however then granted me hours of his time. On the finish of our assembly, he checked out me and stated, “John, I loved this. Whenever you consider extra questions, you possibly can come again and see me once more.” Rating!

One among my former mentees is Courtney McBath, a remarkably proficient younger man who established Calvary Revival Church in Virginia, now one of many nation’s greatest congregations. McBath would begin every of our periods like this:

• That is what you stated…
• That is what I realized…
• That is what I did…
• Did I do it proper?
• Can I ask one other query?
• My reply was all the time: “Ask away.”

Additionally keep in mind, face-to-face conferences are nice; nonetheless, we’re all busy and also you don’t wish to lose steam ready to discover a slot on somebody’s calendar. A mentor is there to provide recommendation whenever you want it most, and generally that recommendation could be shared on a fast name or a single query e mail.

5. Know whenever you’re prepared

My first mentors—after my dad—had been books and audiotapes. I used to be simply beginning out. I wasn’t certified to be tutored by anybody but. What did I do know?

Begin with unbiased examine. Maintain notes. Write down your questions. The perfect of these inquiries may grow to be your model of the “John Wood checklist.”

6. Present your development as a mentee

When you do land a mentor, share your successes, giant and small. Mentors don’t ask to be paid. Their reward is your success.

7. The best way to be a nice mentee: Unfold the love

Nothing makes a mentor happier than to listen to that you just’ve adopted a mentee, that you just’re sharing what you realized via your mentorship expertise with others in your networks and circles.

Your mentor initially agreed to this relationship as an act of paying it ahead. Somebody alongside the best way helped them, and now it’s their flip that will help you. By sharing their time and in search of methods that will help you succeed, an unstated piece of recommendation from them to you is to do that for others.

A part of this text initially appeared within the March 2018 challenge of SUCCESS journal and was up to date in April 2024. Mona Patel contributed to this text. Photograph By fizkes/Shutterstock.com