After the Israel-Hamas warfare started, my 11-year-old son Marty wished me to sum it up.

“Who began it?” he requested as if generations of struggling could possibly be squeezed right into a 30-second video on YouTube Shorts.

“It is determined by whom you ask and if you begin the clock,” I mentioned.

We talked about historical past, conflicts, and cultural experiences.

“It’s sophisticated,” I mentioned. “Generally, when individuals really feel strongly about one aspect, it’s onerous to acknowledge one other.”

Later, I walked to my classroom at New York College, the place I educate journalism, and heard teams of scholars protesting and counter-protesting. I talked to my college students about conflicts.

“Perceive a number of sides of a narrative,” I mentioned. “In case you’re conversant in one perspective, get to know others.”

They appeared surprised. In a room filled with future reporters, there have been no questions. It seems that understanding context isn’t what our brains are wired to do.

I sought to grasp the complexity of the Israeli-Palestinian battle by protecting the second Intifada. (Gaza Strip, 2002)

Supply: Courtesy of Becky Diamond

“The principle problem is that the truth [of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict] is really sophisticated. For most individuals, it’s very onerous to comprise that cognitive complexity,” mentioned Eran Halperin, a professor of psychology on the Hebrew College of Jerusalem.

“Folks want certainty and construction. They’ll’t be a part of two opposing groups on the identical time. So, if a scenario threatens our place, most individuals will turn into extra excessive. That’s what we see at the moment,” he mentioned.

Nonetheless, studying about another person’s viewpoint helps construct empathy and understanding.

Getting Educated

As a child, I purchased lots of bushes for Israel. On Israel’s Independence Day, I waved a blue and white flag.

“Israel should exist,” my grandfather mentioned. “Six million Jews have been murdered within the Holocaust.”

I discovered lots about Israel’s battle for freedom, however nobody taught me concerning the Palestinian perspective till I took a course on the Arab-Israeli battle in faculty.

My professor urged me to take a look at greater than a small number of information.

“Perceive the Palestinian and Israeli expertise,” Professor Jankowski mentioned. I found that my clear-cut view of Israel as an ideal, righteous nation had some holes. It seems that Jews are people, not superheroes.

I turned a journalist and studied Hebrew and Arabic. Through the second Palestinian Intifada, I traveled to Israel with my flak jacket, helmet, and video digicam to supply a documentary on the lethal battle.

“Don’t inform anybody you’re Jewish,” mentioned Peter Arnett, the Pulitzer Prize-winning warfare reporter who was my boss.

We snuck behind Israeli tanks and made our technique to refugee camps within the West Financial institution and Gaza Strip. As a Jew, it was powerful to see the Israeli navy occupation and a inhabitants of Palestinian individuals in a lot ache.

As an alternative of denying their perspective, I documented their struggling. However the battle’s causes are sophisticated.

“The Palestinians have actual grievances [but] there’s a important quantity of oversimplification,” mentioned Mark Tessler, a professor of political science on the College of Michigan in Ann Arbor. He wrote in A Historical past of the Israeli-Palestinian Battle:

I interviewed Palestinian militants within the Gaza Strip. As a Jew, listening to their perspective was informative however not straightforward.

Supply: Courtesy of Becky Diamond

“What’s taking place in Gaza at the moment is gloomy. The pictures are horrible. How might you might have something however anger for individuals doing that? However why are they doing that? What made them get to the purpose that they’re doing that? What are the information?”

There are such a lot of at college students’ fingertips. However discovering steadiness and a whole image isn’t straightforward.

Info Isn’t At all times Information

Once I was in faculty, Tom Brokaw instructed me concerning the first Palestinian Intifada by giving background in his studies.

Thirty years later, youngsters in my classroom aren’t counting on the night information.

“The place can we discover unbiased data?” a scholar requested.

“Not on TikTok,” I mentioned. I instructed a listing of publications and podcasts.

When college students noticed what occurred on October 7, they didn’t have a look at conventional sources for data, defined Professor David Schanzer, Director of the Triangle Heart on Terrorism and Homeland Safety at Duke College’s Sanford College of Public Service. He mentioned,

“College students aren’t going to the two,000-word explainer within the New York Instances. They will their social media websites. They’re listening to TikTok. That types their opinions.”

A 2023 Pew Analysis Heart examine discovered that teenagers and younger adults typically get their information on TikTok. This website exhibits a considerably larger variety of movies with #freepalestine versus #standwithIsrael.

College students search content material that reinforces their place as an alternative of discovering new data and various information that disrupt their considering.

Can Tolerance Be Taught?

Because the warfare progressed, my college students arrived late to class and missed deadlines.

“Are you OK?” I requested after receiving assignments from solely half the category.

“It’s onerous to work,” a scholar mentioned. “There’s a lot happening.”

On faculty campuses, scholar protests have erupted, inflicting confrontations between teams who’re certain their view is the one one which’s proper.

“We wouldn’t wish to be a part of a bunch doing terrible issues. So, we selectively pull a set of information that permits us to imagine we’re on the aspect of goodness, rightness, and ethical readability,” Professor Hunter Gehlbach, an academic psychologist at Johns Hopkins College who research perspective taking, defined.

However, limiting views prevents individuals from seeing the world because it actually is.

“Our minds cheat actuality,” Gehlbach mentioned.

I don’t need my college students to be deceived.

So, as an alternative of citing a listing of particular data that could possibly be accepted or ignored, I centered on discovering widespread floor. I introduced in visitor audio system with expertise in battle protection who talked about common human struggling.

“So many individuals are in ache,” a community information anchor mentioned. “Be a great listener and discover all views.”

I inspired youngsters in my class to get out of their consolation zones.

“It’s OK to really feel uneasy,” I mentioned. “Dig deep to grasp totally different viewpoints.”

Their reporting started to enhance. They coated a number of angles and gave context. Their last items have been sturdy.

On the final day of sophistication, we ate pizza and cupcakes and talked about powerful occasions as a catalyst for development.

“Whenever you depart this class, spend time with somebody who thinks in another way,” I mentioned. “In case you solely hang around with individuals who suppose such as you do, what are you studying?”

When it was time to depart, college students lingered. Often, the category ends with handshakes, however this time, the scholars waited, one after the other, for a hug.

Epilogue

Marty learn the guide Refugee at faculty. It’s historic fiction about three youngsters fleeing warfare, non secular persecution, and poverty.

One of many characters is Josef, a Jewish boy from Berlin who died within the Holocaust. One other was Mahmoud, a Syrian boy who escaped from Aleppo throughout a civil warfare that left 20,000 youngsters lifeless.

“Folks shouldn’t hate one another,” Marty mentioned.

Later, in historical past class, my son, Marty, studied human evolution and crammed out a worksheet: “Why is it essential to review the previous?”

Marty answered, “Once we know what another person went by way of, perhaps we will turn into sort.”

Tricks to See Different Sides of a Battle:

Construct your perspective-taking muscular tissues. My mother at all times mentioned, “Put your self in another person’s footwear.” Psychologists recommend serious about alternative ways to reply questions.

Establish widespread floor. Take into account a few factors that totally different teams can agree on. In accordance with Gehlbach, this will anchor a dialog. “The institution of widespread floor begins perspective taking off in several instructions,” he mentioned.

Debate from the opposite aspect. Attempt to discover the alternative place. Psychologists say that debating can promote understanding throughout various viewpoints and encourage empathy and open-mindedness.