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Zazie and Kristi are joined by Grant Hayter-Menzies to speak about his guide, Freddie: The Rescue Canine Who Rescued Me.
By Zazie Todd PhD.
Watch episode 16 of The Pawsitive Put up in Dialog under or on Youtube, pay attention under or by way of your favorite podcast app (together with Apple, Spotify), or scroll right down to learn highlights.
About this episode
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On this episode, we’re joined by author and biographer Grant Hayter-Menzies to speak about his guide Freddie: The Rescue Canine Who Rescued Me. We discuss how Freddie got here into his life and the essential methods wherein canines assist us, even after we assume we’re those saving them.
Freddie was a terrified rescue canine who took time to settle in, and have become so essential to Hayter-Menzies. Hayter-Menzies tells us about how he wrote biographies of extraordinary ladies, and Freddie’s affect led him to begin writing biographies of essential animals, like Rags (the World Conflict 1 canine), Muggins (the Canadian canine battle hero who raised funds for charity in BC), and Woo (Emily Carr’s monkey).
Then a take a look at on the vet confirmed Freddie had the most cancers hemangiosarcoma. We discuss how they received by this troublesome time, Freddie’s bravery, and the significance of memorializing pets as soon as they’re gone.
Having adopted Freddie as a fearful rescue canine, we get Hayter-Menzies’ ideas for anybody contemplating doing the identical. We additionally ask for his recommendation on discovering the story when writing.
And at last, we talk about the books we’re studying. This episode we advocate:
Good Grief: On Loving Pets, Right here and Hereafter by E.B. Bartels.
The Music of Achilles by Madeline Miller.
Rose Addams by Margie Taylor.
The books can be found from all good bookstores and my Amazon retailer.
About Grant Hayter-Menzies
Grant Hayter-Menzies is a biographer and historian specializing within the lives of extraordinary and unsung heroes of the previous, notably the position of animals in instances of battle. He’s the writer of 13 books, together with Muggins: The Life and Afterlife of a Canadian Canine Conflict Hero, Woo: The Monkey Who Impressed Emily Carr, Dorothy Brooke and the Battle to Save Cairo’s Misplaced Conflict Horses, and From Stray Canine to World Conflict One Hero: The Paris Terrier Who Joined the First Division. He’s additionally literary executor of playwright William Luce.
Study extra about Grant Hayter-Menzies on his web site or comply with him on social media:
Highlights of the episode about Freddie
This interview has been frivolously edited for content material and elegance.
Z: This can be a actually beautiful guide about your life with Freddie and the way Freddie helped you thru some laborious instances. Can we begin with how Freddie got here into your life?
G: Nicely Freddie got here into our lives in September 2010. My ex-husband and I had been searching for one other canine to undertake. We might misplaced our canine Jesse at 19 two years earlier and we felt like we had been on the level the place we might do that. That night earlier than we went to see Freddie on the BC SPCA in Victoria, Les known as me over to the pc. He was wanting on the BC SPCA web site and there was this cute however terrified wanting little foxlike canine, and his title was Frederick. And Les stated why do not we go have a look at him tomorrow? And I stated he will not be there, he is too cute, he appears to be like so in want of care and love. I imply any individual’s going to snap him up. However we went as a result of we had some chores to do downtown and we received there.
And as I inform within the guide, we could not discover him. We went round and round. And naturally the unhappy factor about making the rounds of the shelter is it’s important to have a look at all the opposite doggies which are there that you simply aren’t there to see, they usually’re all taking a look at you considering, “are you the one?” And I used to be so emotionally upset by this, by that point I stated let’s simply go. Les stated “No, I will ask the kennel attendant”. She stated, “Oh Freddie’s right here.” So we went into the again and there he was.
He was essentially the most terrified little canine I’ve ever seen in my life, and I after all fell in love with him the minute I held him. He was shaking like a leaf. We introduced him dwelling. He stood in a nook shaking with out taking a look at us. And this arrange an issue between us, as a result of I am very very similar to my late mom, I nurse grudges in opposition to individuals who damage animals or damage youngsters or anyone who cannot struggle again. And I used to be doing numerous, you already know, violent issues in my thoughts to the individuals who had made this little canine into such a… he did not even know he was a canine. He got here out of a pet mill, he wasn’t socialized, he did not know do any of the issues a traditional canine in my expertise is aware of do. He did not even know what a toy was.
And as we received to the purpose the place he was studying reside with out worry, we then needed to cope with the issue between us, which was he was afraid of me. I who liked him and was very very sensitive feely, he did not need to be close to me. He all the time ran over to my husband. So we lastly known as an exquisite animal therapist named Janet Parker who got here in. And he or she stated he is afraid of you since you’re holding on to numerous stuff that he does not perceive, and you are making some calls for on him that he does not perceive. You to begin with must drop that stuff. But additionally you might want to construct belief with him, and the best way to do this is to feed him by hand on the ground for so long as it takes. And it took about three months, and I describe what occurred in within the guide when he, Freddie, made the choice that he might belief me. And after that we had been we had been quick associates by thick and skinny, actually.
He confirmed me that he might make his personal selections and that he was prepared to belief regardless of what people had finished to him to make him the best way he was. And I simply thought that was wonderful and shifting as effectively.
Z: Yeah, very particular, a canine whose belief you needed to earn although he was supposedly yours to start with.
G: Yeah. Like what offers, I am the one which does every part for you?! However I used to be carrying numerous stuff. And I talked to my mom about it, fortunately she was nonetheless dwelling then, and she or he additionally stated you already know simply let him be, let him be, he’ll come to you. And he or she was proper as moms are [laughter].
Ok: So earlier than Freddie, you used to write down biographies of individuals. And I used to be tremendous as I learn your guide to see the categories of people that you targeted on. I believed these had been actually fascinating, plenty of ladies.
G: Sure.
Ok: How did Freddie change your profession in direction of writing biographies of animals?
G: Nicely due to course I had a suffragette great-grandmother and I used to be surrounded by essentially the most wonderful ladies all of my upbringing. I had a mom who I’ve simply described who was an unimaginable, compassionate girl. She battled bipolar dysfunction and different points that shortened her life, however if you happen to want a military to steer, give it to my mom as a result of she’ll win the battle. She simply could not deal with on a regular basis life.
And I needed to write down about ladies who had made a distinction of their of their fields. And in addition ladies who had been perceived as having gotten the place they had been by their husbands, and I believed no, as a result of I noticed my grandmothers and my mom and aunts all form of dancing on this two-step to make their husbands really feel like they had been truly those that did issues, when it was the ladies who truly ran the present. So that is what led me to to write down ladies’s biography, nevertheless it was watching Freddie make this transformation of selecting to reside with out worry, of selecting to be taught and navigating people, all of the perils of an animal dwelling with human beings, that is all I can say.
And I believed the perfect and most shifting and oftentimes tragic instance of that’s animals conscripted to battle, inhuman wars that no animal ever prompted. And due to him I began researching Rags the World Conflict I canine, rescued off the streets of Paris and who turned a dispatch canine for the American first division, presumably the one one. They did not have dispatch canines, the Individuals. And it simply went from there, exploring how animals cope with all of the complexities of getting to reside in a human managed setting. Together with Emily automotive’s monkey Woo, who numerous fairy tales have been written about however didn’t have a fairy story life.
So I needed to do that, and I devoted these books to Freddie not solely as a result of he was my authentic inspiration, however as a result of he would sit beside my desk and he would spend numerous his time with me whereas I used to be working, and preserve me firm within the lonely enterprise of writing.
Z: I believe we writers all want that. It was actually within the final 12 months of his life that Freddie confirmed his actual bravery. He was extremely courageous, so are you able to inform us a bit about that? I do know that was a troublesome 12 months for him and for you.
G: It was, not least as a result of he was round 13 or 14, we by no means actually knew his age. He had a coronary heart murmur. It was truly a coronary heart murmur that took us to his vet, earlier than the most cancers analysis. That led to an echo cardiogram after which that led to a sonar and that led to discovering that he had hemangiosarcoma on his spleen, which is presumably the worst place you’ll be able to have it since it is a vascular most cancers. And it spreads by the physique by the vascular system, and the spleen is a vascular organ. So we had been mainly instructed he might solely have just a few weeks, even when we do handle to efficiently get his spleen out at his age, and along with his coronary heart murmur he may not survive the surgical procedure.
And so we made the choice to go forward as a result of he so liked dwelling. From all these years, it was his love of life that was so inspiring to me and his curiosity on this planet regardless of having been born in a field and introduced up in a state of affairs the place he wasn’t socialized or had any contact with the actual world. And so it is like ought to we do that or ought to we do this? Nicely I felt, and my accomplice Rudy felt, that we should always give it an opportunity, give him an opportunity to reside.
“They are not identical to stuffed animals that transfer round, they don’t seem to be toys. They’re sentient beings.”
So we proceeded with surgical procedure. He truly aced that simply fantastic. The surgeon stated you already know he may not make it even now however he would possibly. Do you need to strive chemotherapy? We did that. He aced chemotherapy. He had his oncologist on the mainland, the place we needed to go for his therapies, in astonishment as a result of she had by no means seen a canine this previous and with so many different points simply sail by. And issues had been wanting like they might in all probability be okay. The center subject received worse as one would anticipate, after which virtually a 12 months from the day he was identified with hemangiosarcoma, we would taken him into his vet right here in Sydney and it was decided he had lymphoma.
He nonetheless needed to reside. He was all the time enjoying, he was not giving up. And I believed if he is not going to surrender, I am not going to surrender on him. So we went forward with chemotherapy. However the one blissful factor about his passing which occurred in October 2021 is that most cancers didn’t get him, it was his coronary heart, his coronary heart was too… he could not deal with anymore. And it in all probability would have occurred that manner anyway, so we had been instructed. He lived over a 12 months after a hemangiosarcoma analysis which is sort of extraordinary.
Z: That is wonderful.
G: Yeah so it was in spite of everything of that after which his passing, a part of the grief processing for me was to reread the diary I would stored over that 12 months. And what got here from that was, you already know I’d be capable to put this right into a guide which may assist different people who find themselves going by the same state of affairs with their canines or cats or any animal.
Z: I am so sorry you needed to undergo all of that. I do know what hemangiosarcoma is like as a result of that is what we misplaced Bodger to, and Bodger lasted about 5 and a half months after the surgical procedure. Which in itself was wonderful. So for Freddie to handle an entire 12 months is simply unimaginable I believe.
G: Yeah. And I believed I would be writing one thing about this. I believed I would be writing a memoir of how he had made it by, he had survived the worst, and in reality he did he did survive the worst it is simply his coronary heart was… What we guess is that his early trauma was, it had prompted some harm. The place the place he got here from, that the phobia he lived in, I’ve by no means seen a canine simply shaking and petrified of the wind blowing on his fur. And you’ll see why I used to be indignant on the individuals who did this to him. However look what he did, he bloomed, he got here out of it and have become a cheerful wholesome inspiring little canine. He even chased a burglar out of our home.
Ok: And I believe there’s type of a way or possibly it is coming you already know, now could be the time after we can begin to discuss grieving our pets in a manner that I do not assume we might actually possibly 20 years in the past. And I believe it is good to produce other folks’s phrases, to be like, I am not alone. I believe lots of people really feel form of alone, they’re like “I am actually grieving” and it is virtually effectively you are going to come again to work tomorrow or one thing. I believe there simply is not essentially an acceptance.
G: You are proper, you are proper, and it is one thing that I needed to cope with within the guide as effectively. As a result of I used to be introduced as much as deal with animals critically, to take them critically, that they don’t seem to be identical to stuffed animals that transfer round, they don’t seem to be toys, they’re sentient beings. A few of my father’s final phrases had been in regards to the love of animals in our household and he stated it is essential to deal with them as beings, they’re one of many household.
And it is essential to be allowed to grieve as my dad and mom allow us to do. We had a little bit place in our again backyard the place our pets had been buried. My father would make a little bit field, my mom would sew a little bit cushion and put it inside, after which that is the place the pet could be put. We had been inspired to weep and it was taken very critically. And it is okay to do this, if folks might simply let themselves do it. It is also honoring the animal.
One of many issues I did, not simply to write down the guide however as a result of I had the means to take action, I had a a particular portrait made from Freddie by an urn ceramicist in New York State who made particular urns with a portrait of the of the animal on high. And he or she used pictures of Freddie, however she stated how would you want me to point out him, would you like me to point out him asleep or? And I stated I would like him to be proven as he was in his final moments, which was he was terribly sick and we walked into the ICU. He was introduced out of the oxygen cage they usually held the oxygen to his nostril and he stood up for us. Did he assume we had been coming to take him dwelling? What are you aware. However he stood up for us in anticipation of additional life with us. He liked us and I needed him to be proven wanting like that, standing up expectantly. And he or she did an exquisite job, it is a phenomenal factor.
I believe if you are able to do that or have photos round or if you happen to can, if you happen to can have a look at them, there’s so many issues that you are able to do. This can be a guide that I will discuss in a second by E.B. Bartels, she describes among the ways in which folks have discovered to commemorate their pets who’ve handed on. Completely happy methods, it isn’t funerial in any respect as a result of they do not know, they [animals] do not consider loss of life that manner, they reside within the now. They reside within the second of like proper now.
Ok: Yeah I’ve all the time thought that is type of, possibly not a blessing, however one thing that I really feel like I can be taught from animals particularly across the time after we’re saying goodbye,
G: Sure completely. The right way to say goodbye with pleasure. And that is that is what that is what Freddie did. I will always remember it.
Ok: So earlier than, you might have written principally tales about different folks and different animals and that is very a lot a narrative about your self. How did it really feel to type of flay your self open or decide to to speak about your self on this manner? It’s totally private.
G: Terrible. However I knew I needed to, there isn’t any different method to do it. I am used to being the stage supervisor who places the life on the stage and pulls the curtain and does all of the lighting. I am not used to being the individual on the stage of a specific guide. However there was no different method to do it, significantly as I used to be utilizing so many diary entries from the diary I stored of that 12 months of Freddie’s 12 months. And I mainly needed to attempt to inform the story by my very own expertise, my very own eyes, however keep out of the best way as a lot as I might.
“I needed to write down about ladies who had made a distinction of their of their fields.”
However there have been so many tales about animals from my household, so many reminiscences from childhood. There have been numerous beloved animals in my household and I needed to do justice to them as effectively. All of them mattered. And I am considering of doing one other one truly. Our Nico, our new adopted pup who additionally got here out of a pet mill, he has all of the traits of a kid that is been bullied. And I used to be that bullied little one in elementary college and up till highschool in reality. That is what sort of made me right into a author. I form of went off the crushed path of my friends and selected a special form of life, not a simple one nevertheless it made me into what I needed to be. And I am considering of a memoir of coping with this little canine popping out of his shell and form of the best way I did as a baby by animals, an amazing deal on the time. So I’d do it once more nevertheless it’s gonna take some thought. However I needed to write this, I needed to do it for him.
Z: So that you talked about Nico. Inform us about Nico after which additionally I would prefer to know what you’ll say to somebody who is considering adopting a fearful rescue canine?
G: So Nico additionally got here out of a pet mill hoarding state of affairs. He is about two. He is a Miniature Poodle combined with a few different like Havanese and Bichon I believe, however he is principally Poodle. I preserve saying to of us that ask about Nico, we could not have dealt along with his points with out having the earlier expertise of serving to Freddie. As a result of I imply had anybody else had this canine handed to them they could have handed him again in just a few days, as a result of he was unsocialized. A part of it’s because he got here on an extended journey. He is younger. He had been by numerous experiences nevertheless it was very sophisticated for a couple of good month or two. And it will not have been attainable had we not realized what we realized from Freddie.
What I might say to folks, sure while you go to a shelter to take a look at an animal to undertake, whether or not it is a canine cat rat no matter it’s, there’s going to be the one which’s hiding within the nook and that’s afraid and is not working round and leaping and enjoying just like the others. That was Freddie. And I might counsel it isn’t simple, it isn’t for everyone, however I might counsel give that little animal an opportunity. As a result of I picked the little scared canine within the nook and he modified my life, modified my profession, gave me a cause for dwelling at a really low time. And that is what they do. And we modified his life immeasurably. So if you happen to can deal with it, give it an opportunity, give the little scared frightened animal an opportunity for a brand new life as a result of it may well change yours.
In regards to the co-hosts
Kristi Benson is an honours
graduate of the celebrated Academy for Canine Trainers, the place she earned
her Certificates in Coaching and Counseling (CTC). She additionally has gained
her PCBC-A credential from the Pet Skilled Accreditation Board. She
has just lately moved to lovely northern British Columbia, the place she
will proceed to assist canine guardians by on-line educating and
consultations. Kristi is on workers on the Academy for Canine Trainers,
serving to to form the subsequent era of canine professionals. Kristi’s
canines are rescue sled canines, principally retired and completely having fun with a great
snooze in entrance of the woodstove.
Kristi Benson’s web site Fb Twitter
Zazie Todd, PhD,
is the award-winning writer of Wag: The Science of Making Your Canine Completely happy and Purr: The Science of Making Your Cat Completely happy. She is the creator
of the favored weblog, Companion Animal Psychology, and likewise has a column
at Psychology As we speak. Todd lives in Maple Ridge, BC, together with her husband,
one canine, and one cat.
As an Amazon Affiliate I earn from
qualifying purchases. As an Etsy affiliate and Marks and Spencer
affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
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